The stories we tell ourselves are often a way of avoiding our direct experience. If we are still carrying pain from the past and it is triggered in the present by relationships or circumstances, we can create a narrative about the event to shield ourselves from directly experiencing the sadness, grief or feelings of loneliness.
However, as we continue to open to life, we see that Liberation is found in the willingness to be with our experience without resistance, story and ultimately without a separate sense of self.
When there has been great pain it can be overwhelming, especially to our nervous system, to experience this all at once or alone. The processing and releasing of the imprint, that the wound has left behind, is difficult to achieve in isolation. Most imprints of wounding have happened through relational disharmony and thus, healing through a relationship with the right therapist or healer can be a more efficient and holistic approach than navigating it alone.
Having said that, there are times when navigating the terrain of healing and awakening can only be done alone. The intuitive knowing of when to engage in support and when to be with your aloneness can be developed over time and learnt from someone who has already traversed the landscape.
So, the next time you feel conflicted about something have a look at the story you are telling yourself. This is not to disregard your story as if it is unimportant but to see if in the telling of it you are blocking the emotions that want to be felt and to move. When we are conditioned either in childhood or by society to block the flow of emotions, we are blocking our essential life force. The habit of going to the mind in order to not feel is established and becomes an automatic response.
This habit may seem to protect us from pain but in the end, it numbs us out from truly being here and experiencing the joy that is available to us. If we resist pain, we also resist joy.